19-12-2009…………………….Learning to Feel
 
Before we leave on our holidays, I thought we should end on actually allowing ourselves to feel all our emotions. Moving into 2010, we are going to have to leave behind our conditioned responses, i.e. our reactions. We are going to have to leave behind our judgments, which arise out of these conditioned responses. We are going to have to leave behind the way we label people and things which arises out of our conditioned responses.
 
Let’s understand ‘conditioned responses’. In a sense, we have given ourselves training to react to a situation or a person, in a particular manner. This training involves colour and caste, gender and status, being dark and not being dark and so on. We label events as hurtful, harmful, happy, pleasant, not pleasant, and so on.
 
We want to live in a constant state of happiness. That is our desire. We do not wish to face any moment or any situation that might be a little distasteful or completely disturbing. Although this is what our adaptive minds want to experience, the soul experiences only those events and only those persons that will take the soul towards its purpose, its mission.
 
E.g. my adaptive mind may want to spend a lot of time with x who makes me feel good, with whom I have a very good energy equation, but my soul may decide that that person will be met by me once in 2 years, and, instead, may bring to me those persons whom I would rather avoid. As soon as this takes place, I’ve already built up 2 conditioned responses within me: one is I want to be with x and the 2nd is I don’t want to be with y. Where do these come from? My feelings: my feelings of like and dislike.
 
To get rid of our conditioned responses, we are going to have to release our feelings. We will have to open up to our feelings. Unless we do this, we will not be able to recognize, identify, and acknowledge those feelings which we would like to be liberated from.
 
We use the term ‘indifferent’ very often. It’s a term we have trained ourselves to use because our spiritual learning has taught us: do not dislike. That is why, when dislike comes up, instead of acknowledging it, we hide behind words and say: I am indifferent. Each time we do not recognize the feeling accurately, it gets suppressed as energy, within our energy structure. Like any suppressed energy, it starts creating an energy block. These blocks first take place in the meridians. When these meridians get over-filled with their share of blocks and cannot deal with these anymore, the consequences spill over into our physical body.
 
Feelings that are suppressed reside in our muscles. It is our muscles that take the first brunt of all feeling. When you are angry or stressed or in fear, your physical body gets tight, your muscles get taut. That’s because the muscle is getting the full onslaught of this energy and it’s trying to protect itself. The muscles that take most of the brunt are in the neck, the back of the neck, the shoulders, the back and the muscles that are around our knees.
 
When the muscles close, it is called ‘muscle armouring’; the muscles are creating an armour against the attacking feeling, because the adaptive mind has already informed the muscle: threat --- attack--- fight. If we were in a constant state of spirit consciousness instead of ego consciousness, we would instantly recognize the feeling arising within us and would work with that feeling instead of closing ourselves to it.
 
Once the muscles have contracted over an extended period of time, they forget how to loosen up and will remain in a permanent state of being armoured. As soon as this state is reached, all the bones around the contracted muscle begin to hurt. This constant pressure on the bones leads to arthritis, rheumatism and the like.
 
If even this stage the block is not recognized, the feelings then seep into our lymphatic nodes and into our blood stream. As soon as they enter into the lymphatic nodes and the blood stream, every single organ is under attack.
 
2010 is the Year of Unity, but the only way unity can be attained is when there is no labeling; neither good nor bad. As soon as we label someone ‘good’, somewhere, maybe unspoken, we label another as ‘bad’. We have to be in a state of acceptance of all. The only way you can accept all is when you can accept you, as everything you represent. If you are constantly battling against your feelings, how will you accept yourself?
 
Have you noticed how the world around us actually helps us not to feel? Feelings have no place in the corporate world. Conditioned responses become reaffirmed because the world in which we are working for several hours every day, is actually giving us a pat on the back and saying, well done, and those who are sensitive to feelings are considered too soft to be successful in this world.
 
The other day, someone said to me, “My friends constantly tell me I am too naïve and too gullible. But I like to think the best of people. I am not comfortable distrusting others.” 2010 is going to be a year in which we have to break the mould that we are in and the mould that we have put others in.
 
We have to understand the difference between feelings and emotions. Feeling is a bodily sensation and emotion is a reaction to an event. Fear is the emotion, making you feel either angry or upset, which is a bodily sensation. It is only when you have recognized the feeling, recognized the bodily sensation, that you can reach the deeper level of recognizing emotion. A blocked meridian system does not have the power to work with something as strong as an emotion. Once the meridians are cleared of blocks, we begin to genuinely connect with people.
 
2009 has not been an easy year for many; there has been upheaval, physically, mentally, emotionally; people have lost their jobs and some their homes. We are ready for 2010 to the extent that we have understood the situations presented to us, and worked with these situations instead of resisting and repelling them. A large part of humanity, I believe, is ready to move towards unity. Though our intentions are genuine, many falter because they just don’t know how. ‘How’ starts from releasing the suppressed debris that is already present in our structures, and allowing the meridians to be free-flowing channels. We already know that 2010 is bringing to us wondrously powerful light energies. How will they flow through our system if our meridians are blocked? Once the meridians are cleared, the prana, the higher light energy that flows through the meridians, will naturally release us from emotional entrapment.
 
Let me share with you a very simple, but surprisingly, powerful technique to work with your bodies in order to reach the emotional field, the higher emotional field, the mental field and the higher mental field. To release all the blocks that are present in the physical bodies, emotional and mental bodies, we will work upon our fingers, opening up to feeling, opening up our structure to the energy of different feelings; to recognize them honestly, allowing ourselves to release them, clearing the meridians completely, allowing light energy to flow through them, so that when emotions come up, and express themselves as events, we recognize the purpose of the event, and respond to it appropriately.
 
You may teach this simple exercise to your children, as well. In order to release feeling, we must ideally work with one feeling at a time, over a consistent period of time. Before you can work with that one feeling, you need to identify, very accurately, the feeling. Do not get caught in generalizations.
 
(Do this exercise slowly).Close your eyes and go into a deep, quiet, private place. Take your mind to a person or event which you generally react to, whether the reaction is internal or an externally expressed. Allow the mind to re-experience this event, this person, as though it were happening right now, right here. As you re-experience, allow yourself to be in full awareness of your physical body. You will gradually become aware of constrictions, tingling, numbness, other such sensations. Take your time over this. Let your body speak to you. Be aware of the parts of the body that are reacting to the energy of this feeling.
 
Now that you have identified the body sensation, connect to that sensation and fine-tuned yourself to the feeling. Gently rub the palms of your hands together. You are activating energy centers that lie in your palms. Love yourself through this action of rubbing your palms.
 
Let your palms lie gently by your side and feel the energy that is now surging through them. When you feel the surge of energy, you know that you are ready to start with the next step.
 
With your right hand, gently hold the tip of your thumb of your left hand and gently rub it round and round. As you rub, give a command to this energy center. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of (please state the feeling) from my physical body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of ……from my physical body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of….…from my physical body. The pressure on the tip should be gentle but not very light.
 
Let’s move to the forefinger. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my mental body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my mental body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my mental body.
 
The middle finger. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my higher mental system. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my higher mental system. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my higher mental system.
 
The ring finger. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my emotional body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my emotional body. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my emotional body.
 
The little finger. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my higher emotional system. I am ready and completely willing to remove the feeling of … from my higher emotional system. I am ready and completely willing to release the feeling of … from my higher emotional system.
 
After this, you turn to your right hand, again starting with the thumb, gently rubbing each tip with your left hand. Just to reiterate: the thumb is the physical body, the forefinger is your mental body, the middle finger is the higher mental system, the ring finger is your emotional body and the small finger is the higher emotional system.
 
Why are we working on the higher mental system and the higher emotional system? Once you have released the feeling from the physical, mental and emotional bodies, you do not wish to re-experience that feeling. You want to free yourself completely from that feeling, so you approach the higher mental and the higher emotional systems that liberate you from that feeling completely. The higher emotional system works not on the feeling energy itself, but on every emotion that releases the same feeling and bodily sensation.
 
Through this very simple exercise you are liberating yourself from the feeling and the emotion attached to those feelings. The most obvious benefit of this is that you will not be out of touch with your body. How many times have we said: ‘I have a backache. I don’t know why.’ ‘I have a headache. I don’t know why.’ ‘My throat is sore. I don’t know why’. ‘I don’t know why’ means that you are out of touch with your body, either completely or as in most cases, partially.
 
The second benefit is that you are not out of touch with others. This is crucial in 2010. We cannot put up shields between ourselves and others. When the muscle armours itself, it creates an energy shield, which we call the defense system. As long as we need our defense systems, we will not be in complete unity. We have to re-train our muscles to understand that vulnerability is the strongest expression of inner power; opening yourself to all without feeling threatened.
 
So why not work, each day, on something as simple as this? It’s so simple it can be done anywhere, at any time. You don’t have to follow a strict sequence. You may work with one hand now continue with the other a little later. Do it whenever you get the time.
 
Work with one feeling consistently for 15 or 17 days, 3 times a day, and the mind will be conditioned to release that feeling whenever it arises. How will you know that you are done with that one feeling? That feeling will appear less and less and less. Before you start working with a feeling, when you’re in your sacred space, ask self: ‘on a scale of 1 to 10, where am I?’ Let’s assume 7. After you finish the exercise, check again. It will keep going down till you come to 0. That’s when you can move on to another feeling.
 
The day you find that it’s jumped higher, go through the previous 24 hours very closely. Very often, we don’t realize that we are reacting because we have trained ourselves to be ‘closed’. For example: your boss may be accustomed to firing you each time you are in his office. When he calls you, your defence system goers on high alert without your conscious awareness, but your physical, mental and emotional systems are in full awareness of this process. You may claim I am indifferent to him now. You are not indifferent; you have built up a superlative defense mechanism.
 
There is something here that I wish to share with you. I have experienced this with some of the persons I have worked with. When this happened the first time I was taken by surprise. Even when 0 feeling has been reached, the person physically reacts in almost exactly the same manner. The person is reacting out of habit!
 
May you be liberated and empowered in 2010.