• EllaeenahJF

My Life is My Choice Alone


Let us meet with two angelic spirit guides, Aryaman and Vohuman, who are in a high state of joy. Their excited vibrations show how elated they are. Yes, you may well ask ‘why’. They are off on a new mission that involves meeting a soul who has decided that it is the right time for it to return to an earthly incarnation, and is ready to undertake the rather lengthy process of charting its new life course. Aryaman and Vohuman have been given the sacred duty of being the angelic guides for this soul. Their thrill at this opportunity to serve yet another soul is boundless.

When the angels reach their destination, they wait. Their energy fields would ‘tingle’ as soon as the light of the one they are to serve, comes close. They look around at the many souls gathered there, each soul being blessed with the opportunity to go to Earth to fulfil their chosen purposes. Simultaneously, their energy fields began to ‘tingle’, and they know that the soul assigned to them has entered the Blueprint Chamber. Aryaman and Vohuman rush in, and warmly embrace the soul before sitting at the main table to chart the blueprint. This process is extremely significant as the blueprint details what the soul wishes to do on Earth, what it wishes to learn, and what it would like to resolve in this new incarnation. The angelic guides open the Akashic Records so that the soul can experience, and review, the energies of all its previous journeys on Earth, reaffirming the all-important soul mission for which the soul had originally separated from Source, and towards which the soul endeavours to move in each embodiment. Aryaman and Vohuman sit in silence while the soul reviews and assimilates, deeply, the wisdom of its existence, connecting to its Core Cosmic Energy, and drawing from it the inspiration required for the charting process. After a considerably long while, the soul looked up, and the angelic guides could see that a decision had been reached. Through thought-communication, they urged the soul to write down the main lesson that the soul wished to learn of in in the coming incarnation. ‘Understanding the Truth about Power and Male Domination’ wrote the soul. Their angelic energies resonated deeply with this decision. This was perfect for the evolution of the soul.

They wondered how the soul would tackle this. Gently, they encouraged the soul to choose the gender that the soul would be embodied as. They were joyously surprised when the soul chose ‘feminine’. They guessed the kind of path that the soul would carve out for this coming incarnation. They were right. The soul went on to choose some challenging experiences that revolved around ‘control’.

As soon as the soul decided to be born a girl, Aryaman and Vohuman began to refer to the soul as ‘Her’. Now would start the time-consuming task of choosing souls with whom to create contracts; some contracts would be accepted, but others would not, as they might not fit in with blueprints already charted. Some contracts would be signed in Light with those souls who were already embodied, and others with souls who were still planning their personal embodiments and blueprints.

Vohuman knew that it was time to take up the responsibility of contacting and connecting with the angelic guides of those who might agree to enter into contract with the soul, to request of the Angelic Guides that these souls be brought into the Blueprint Chamber to meet with ‘Her’. As the souls came in, one by one, Aryaman presided over the discussion, to ensure that the blueprint of no soul would be compromised even marginally by the contract. And so there followed a long process of viewing the bigger picture, and then breaking it down into little ‘jigsaw pieces’ by ‘craftsmen’ like Aryaman and Vohuman.

Once this was done, the two angelic guides stepped back for her to enter the Cave of Creation. They knew that into this cave only the soul can enter; only the soul who wishes for human incarnation. They waited while the energy changes within the cave turned this disembodied soul into one that is ready for the process of embodiment.

Soon the day, date, and time that she had chosen for her entry into the human world neared, and the angels made preparations to ensure that all their angelic helpers would make her birth into this human world a smooth one. This was the soul’s choice. The date decided by her was 1st September, because the astrological sign would give her all the feminine attributes she wished for. She had already created a sacred spiritual agreement with those who would be her earthly mother and the father.

As 1st September dawned bright and clear, Aryamana and Vohuman waited for that moment chosen by her, to ensure that nothing would go awry by even a microsecond. And at the chosen time, in the chosen place, and in the chosen way, ‘she’ was born. Aryaman and Vohuman waited on either side of her. They knew that for a number of years, their task, their service, would involve only patient waiting. Yes, they had also signed in Light, the contract with her.

As soon as ‘she’ was born, the chamber of planning, and the cave of creation was erased from her memory space. She forgot her embodied and disembodied soul friends, and the contracts she had signed in Light, as Aryaman and Vohuman carried out the vital task of placing veil upon veil of forgetfulness upon her, knowing that with each veil they placed upon her, she strengthened her presence in the human realm, but remained constantly connected to her higher soul energies in the etheric realm.


For 47 years they stood by her, not saying a word. Not raising a tiny feather in their wings to help her. That permission had not been granted to them by the soul. Those experiences she had chosen, which might seem harsh to the human sensitivity, were vital to her. Vital for her soul purpose, for soul learning. Controlling father. Weak-willed mother. Painful divorce of parents. Meanness of the step-father. Cruel male teacher at school. Sexual abuse. The anger built up. A storm raged within her. The angels stood by, giving her the full force of their loving support, silently. They witnessed how in her associations with men she spewed out her hatred for them, how she tried to control them in any way she could. They witnessed her two bitter divorces. They witnessed how money came pouring in, for she had not chosen poverty as an experience. Money came to her easily, and wealth and business growth and success. She had male staff whom she hired and fired at will, whom she enjoyed subjugating. Her reputation of being a man-hater preceded her wherever she went. The hot anger against the men in her life who had abused her, was vented as malice and cruelty exercised against the men who worked for her.

As she neared her 47th birthday, Aryaman and Vohuman began to feel the same anticipation and thrill that they had felt those several years ago, when they were first going to encounter their new mission, because they knew that now they could have the opportunity to work in service rather than wait in service. But they also knew that their work could not start till a very important event in her life had taken place. As she signed the entry form to take part in a global seminar, “The Changing World of Money”, they felt joy - she was one step closer to that important event. They waited in trepidation as she debated within herself whether she should attend or skip the seminar.

The day of the global seminar dawned, and Aryaman and Vohuman waited. The doors opened and closed, as one by one hundreds of leaders of industry from all over the world entered those plush halls. And then the door opened one more time, and in walked a lady, impeccably dressed in what was clearly an outfit that might have cost someone else more than a year of wages. As she walked in, every head in the hall turned to look. Not because she was so beautiful, not because she was one of the most important leaders there, but because she emanated an aura, which even the most hard-headed corporate executive could feel. Tangibly. They were all drawn to her as she took her seat.

Our soul friend also saw her. Was also drawn to her. The seminar was to last a week. Through that week our soul friend continued to look at this woman in utter amazement and ill-concealed admiration. Aryaman and Vohuman were ecstatic that she was so clearly affected by the energy emanated by this lady. She had been one of the disembodied souls who had agreed to meet our soul friend at this time, in this place, in the 47th year of the soul’s life. And it had all come together. As planned. Now only one thing remained. Would the soul approach the woman? Free will overrides everything. Soul contracts can be overturned by free will. If she did approach this lady, Aryaman and Vohuman knew they would have a lot of work to do. If she didn’t, they would have to continue to wait in service.

On the last day of the seminar, almost as though against her will, our soul friend found her feet being magnetically directed towards this lady. When she came up to her, she neither introduced herself, nor greeted the lady. She just blurted out, “How do you do it? I know who you are, and I know how many men you have working under you. How do you manage to stay so calm, so peaceful? How do you manage to stay unaffected by the presence of these men?” Hearing this, Aryaman and Vohuman were in a state of bliss. The moment had taken place. She had asked the question; she had opened the door to transformation. For the next five years this beautiful lady would help our soul friend understand male ego, male control, and the mistruth and truth of power, including male domination. For the next five years, this beautiful lady would introduce her to those who had contractually agreed to help her heal.

Gently, gradually, our soul friend began to recognise and acknowledge the anger within her. She began to recognise and acknowledge the roles played by her father, mother, step-father and teacher. She learnt that blame is a dishonour to those soul friends who agree to help us. She learnt that only we have the spiritual power to change our lives. Our lives are our choice.

One day, believing that she was all alone (not knowing that Aryaman and Vohuman had never left her side for even a moment), she cried out from the depths of her soul, “God, help me to understand the misdeeds that I have committed, and overcome this pain.” Intent had been put out. She had invited the Universe to open to her its doors of wisdom and consciousness. She had taken a decision to remove the veils that Aryaman and Vohuman had put upon her. As the veils lifted, our friend went through many painful realisations of self, till finally, at the age of 53, she married for the third time; this time not to dominate over a man, but to have an equal loving relationship.

Now Aryaman and Vohuman knew that it was time for them to depart. Her soul had grown to such a level of consciousness that different guides would take their place. They invited in the Archangels, and they invited in the Ascended Masters, to bring to her those guides necessary for her. Giving her one last feathery kiss, they departed in joy after having been with her for 53 years of her earthly existence.

What happened to our soul friend after that we don’t know, but we do know that she passed all the tests placed before her with grace, acceptance and love. She understood that no test is put before you that you have not chosen for yourself. She understood that to human awareness and understanding the chosen tests might not make ‘sense’, but that, that was not important, because the soul had chosen so, and soul chooses only out of deep spiritual consciousness. She understood with the help of loving spiritual counsellors who came her way that, as a man, in many past incarnations, she had misunderstood and misused power and control. She had considered power to be domination, aggression, suppression of those weaker than her. The most significant moment of free will choice had come to her when she encountered the beautiful lady. ‘Should I transform? Do I wish to learn about power? Do I overcome hatred?’ All that ensued, was the result of her free-will choice to leave behind the past, to unfold a bright present.

This could have been our story, yours or mine. We don’t know how many angels have stood by us in silent service, never receiving a word of gratitude because we did not even know they were there. Every time we cried our tears believing we were alone, they were there; two of them, one at each side, as our life unfolded in the way we charted it. And our soul friends kept their ends of the contracts, even when we did not recognize them as our soul friends.

(Inspired by a parable of Kryon)


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​© 2016 by Ellaeenah Jadefire.